Dominating Crimson (crimsonobsessor) wrote,
Dominating Crimson

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Fuckin A u rock man!

Are u a System of a Down fan
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I rock! And I was guessing at most of the answers! :D

This week is being so very eventful...My brain doesn't know what to feel, between wanting to have a nervous breakdown over the atrocious way I've treated certain people, and wanting to jump for joy over several recent events...I shoved this nonsense on poor Bridgie last night, since LJ was acting up and I just had to put it somewhere:

'Wow. A pretty eventful night. I get a phone call from a guy I've hurt very badly, saying we may not be able to remain friends [hence that previous post], I missed Bridgie [sniffle], but then AF came on so I talked to her. Then, wonder of wonders, Eric Trueheart came on!!! And we talked for...about an hour or so. It doesn't get any more fun than that, oh no. Showed him tons of Bridgie pics [evil grin Bridgie], which he loved. He said you have a really neat style! Ha! and now you're probably gonna kill me, but it was worth it.

So just when I thought the night was looking up, and I'd be able to sleep soundly with hopes for tomorrow...I get an email from the one person I've hurt more than anyone in the past two years, the person for whom I can't get through a single day without turning guilty thoughts to him. All this and yet I haven't had the strength, haven't been able to overcome my cowardice enough to finally give him some sort of resolution. What I did to him is probably the only thing in my life I'm truly ashamed of. And he's taken it with nothing but honor. And I couldn't even give him that in return. He gave and gave to me, and we helped each other through some of the worst patches of our lives, but I was the one to falter, to lose the relationship and...What am I supposed to do.

I couldn't possibly do more harm than I've already done. What do you say to someone you've treated that badly? Oh...there's no excuse for what I've done, no response. I would almost say no forgiveness, yet I know that he's just that good, that he would, and probably already has, forgiven. I never deserved him. I'm so glad I had him as a friend, but wish so much that I hadn't done what I did. Almost better that we'd never met...

Fuck. I'm gonna go cry now...'

Garg. I no feel like talking about that anymore. I'm not gonna be able to deal with it till tomorrow at least. I just can't take it :P. I'd rather dwell on the happinesses right now...

Ebay is so very evil XD. Such a wonderful, tempting evil. Thursday I ended up Buying It Now the Invader Zim cellphone cover!!! The thing was shipped the next day apparently, cause it was waiting for me on the bed when I got home today!!! And it's SO PRETTY!!!! XD I can't wait to get a phone!!! Wonder how much a Nokia 5100's gonna cost.

And today I went moseying around that evil little site, and ended up buying Phantom of the Opera (1924 version, the GOOD one) on DVD!!! I waited three months for my boss to tell me the distributors couldn't get it for me, and even if they had it would've been $30.95 O_o. AND the distributors today told me we CAN get The Last Unicorn on VHS for $9.99!!! I didn't think they were even making it anymore, but apparently it's in stock and on it's way here! I'm crossing my fingers ^_^.

Oh and I couldn't stop there. I had to make ONE last purchase, something I shouldn't have bought but if it turns out right I'll be oh so glad I did. I got IZ's 38 episodes on DVD ^_^. I'm still holding my breath for an official release, which I'll be waiting in line for first day, but until then, this will do nicely! I've been terrified by the idea of my VHS copies getting messed up :P. No more worries!

In other DVD news, when I come home tomorrow I'm going to sit my brother down in front of the TV and we're going to watch The Ring!! That movie's so damn scary O_O. And we even got the original Japanese version for rent, on VHS and DVD!!! XD Trippy. The Japanese one's okay, but the American's better (I never thought I'd EVER say that.) Hm...Note to self: In the morning, grab The Ring, talk to Paul about the contest.

I'm also going to Best Buy tomorrow, to look for Evanescence's new CD. Hopefully it'll be on that really cheap first day deal Best Buy has on their CDs. Cause I really can't afford it otherwise XD. Well, I can't afford it anyway.

Well fook. I just remembered I told my stepbrother and Steve I may go out with them tomorrow if they wanted me to...-_-;;; All this guilt and now I'm wishing they'd decide not to go out. Shite.

Well that can't overpower the unbelievable greatness of the best news of the whole day...

A couple weeks again, when we were having our monthly meeting and I was raking in the Rewards memberships for the Blockbuster contest, Paul and the other managerial type peoples got together and decided I should get a prize for doing so well. (The contest ended yesterday, with me selling 271 of the store's 700 something total Rewards sales.) Since Paul had won tickets to the Elton John, Billy Joel concert in Little Rock, he gave them to me. Mom and I were going to go, until they canceled the concert. Fast forward to today. I was going on and on about Linkin Park's new album, when Paul said "Speaking of which..." Apparently, one of Paul's old comrades, from the days when he was head of security for Memphis's best stadium, the Pyramid, called him up last night. He informed him of a certain concert of a certain band that will take place here in June. A concert for which Paul says he'll try to get tickets. Tickets for me. For a band that just happens to be...LINKIN FREAKING PARK!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!! [runs around screaming incoherently]

[pant pant] [shoe shoe]

I've been burned too many times lately to believe it until it happens, but DAMN!!!! DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAAAAAAMN!!!! ...I would be the happiest little drooling wormbaby of all time ;_;.

[pauses Lorrena McKennit's Parallel Dreams to listen to Somewhere I Belong again...for the thirtieth time]

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